Humility is Just a Thin Patch of Ice Away

Today began pretty well. Despite some soreness from yesterday's November Project, my easy mile went smooth. The weather had improved and this morning was all but spring like. I had no inhibitions at all about hopping on the bike to ride off to work, even with a heavier than usual bag. One thin film of ice on the slope coming out of my building's parking lot sent me to the ground quick. After dusting myself off and getting the chain hooked back up I headed out to work. The chain suffered some stress somewhere from the fall and snapped off a block from work.

It hurt hitting the ground and I hate waiting till I get home to inspect the damage closer, but all things considered, it wasn't too bad a wipe out. I'm a bit more sore than I was prior to tensing up like that, but it could have easily been worse. As a guy that will ride till it hits zero in the winter, I know there are chances of wipe out. What it did was slap me with some humility in a quick way. As I said, I'll ride in almost anything (run too), and sometimes that makes me a little cocky. I am very cautious on the roads as I trust no one, but my mindset probably needed to come down a notch or two.

With luck, all will be fixed in time to ride tonight. Those are accidents that are not quite so bad.

Good Review

This year I have been focused on 3 areas of "good" and am pretty happy with the results for the most part. On the eating "good" front, I am surprised to say I have almost converted entirely to a vegan diet. For a considerable time I said I leaned vegetarian. Now I would say it's a 90/10 vegan to vegetarian diet. I gave it a hell of a test too with over 1200 miles logged thus far. I truly feel great!

The good music part has been a exploration of more jazz and indie work. I am still not able to identify different pieces that easily as I am mostly just listening to the radio and audible is my worst learning style. None the less, a high tempo rift makes me smile every time. I am also loving the mesh of modern stuff I have stumbled upon. Finding "Girl Talk" was a wonderful find and will forever remind me of the Denver Cruiser Night I heard it first.

The good sleep is still a work in progress. Sleep and I have not gotten along well my entire life. I have most consistently wished it was not necessary at all or that I could just have a button and make it happen. In effort to get more "good" sleep, I have tried to go to bed earlier and more regularly get up at the same time. While training, I was up at 5:30 a lost every morning to get some miles before work in. I still don't sleep too well, but I keep trying. Put the body in the right place and hope it works.

It has been fun to focus on these 3 areas all year. I do appreciate the difference when given a choice. It is also nice to know that I have been monkey free for three and a half weeks. 2013 has been pretty all right!

Thanks!

There are lots of people out there doing amazing things each and every day. We have our heroes that we regard highly whether they wear a team's uniform or a military one. Our firefighters, police, and lesser known civil servants that make our daily life move with less difficulty. What I am constantly in awe of though are the unsung heroes all about. For fear of sounding cliche, I am impressed with all you moms and dads, you students working your way through school, and the people that suit up each day with a name tag on trying to better their place one humble day of work at a time. To you delinquents trying to turn things around and folks that are immersed in grand life struggles but still manage to hold the door a moment longer than is comfortable to help someone out. To the people that don't need to say good morning, but do. to the drivers that realize driving is a privilege and offer a moment of that precious time to let someone in. To the people that keep trying to make us smile and those that keep us from crying. There are so many people out there doing some tremendous things no featured in a "news feed" or anywhere else. I admire your spirit and continued battle to make each day a tad better for having been in it.

I appreciate you.

Live and Let Live

There was a bit on the radio yesterday about a man seeking approval for surgeury to relieve his weight problem. I found myself struggling in my desire to judge him. It's a quality I have grown to dislike, my mental judgement. While I have long learned the value of not saying all the things that cross my mind, I am still working on the mental game. What happens in my head affects my happiness as much as my actions. I also believe I have no authority to judge anyone. My opinions, even when popular, are just my opinions. While I would not make the same choices as someone like the man on the radio, it's his life and it does not affect mine. Live and let live is easy to say but doing it and more importantly thinking it is still an aim I am trying to achieve. 

Coffee With a Friend

I know there are a few things I just love in this world. The feelings have never wavered. I love a stormy day, the kind where it gets so dark street lights come on in the middle of the day. I love an underdog win. I also love coffee with someone I care about. Some of my friendships have been forged this way. A cup of coffee at just the right time. I am a friend for life. My shortened list may not sound that exciting to most people but I do bring it up for a reason and it is not that I believe I am in anyway that interesting. I bring it up because there are times when I need to know a few go to "loves" to pull me through a tough patch. Perhaps it's an hour of uncertainty, perhaps its a week of turmoil. What ever it is, just remembering how those loves change my perspective and feelings helps.

If you are having a tough one, I hope you can think of a can not fail happy to help pull you through. They don't fix me, but they sure as hell give me reason to believe this too shall pass.

24 at a time

There are days where up is down and left is right. Today is one of those days already. I am reminded that countless hours wasted to try and think my way out of these spots has never worked and to stay in the moment. I ask simply to have the fear that drives the chaos engine in my brain to be quieted and focus on doing what is before me. I try and stay mindful of being helpful as an ass-backward approach (that works) to getting out of my own funk. Today focusing on what is in front of me is my best approach and yes that included drinking my OJ. For what it's worth, I am grateful.

Second Chance to Run NYC

I received an email last night letting me know there was an unexpected opening on the Team PAWS NYC Marathon team. After releasing my spot, responsibly, I had finally made my peace with not getting to go. I believe things and opportunities arise when they are supposed to and am exploring my options to see if this can work out.

Regardless, it is flattering to have been given the invite. I was told it was based on my enthusiasm with online posts and success in fund raising thus far.

If it works out, I will know soon.

Routine

I get up early to get my runs in now before work. It helps that it's also the coolest time of the day. Walk the dogs, little breakfast and bike to work. My days are starting to have some routine and I can't believe I am saying this, but it is awesome! I love have some stability in what I do and my new job is fabulous. The closeted math geek in me is finally getting some use. I appreciate having this and am ever grateful. 

Rule 62

Mad Max theme for Denver Cruiser Ride

Rule 62: Don't take yourself too damn seriously.

Taking a Walk

As of late, Tiff and I have been taking the dogs for a longer walk in the evening. It has been a great relaxation doing this. I am trying acclimate to not having to work hard all the time as I had for several months now. When I wasn't at work, I was working to find work or supplementing with some extra work. Having time off, even at the end of the day feels pretty new. These walks have been perfect for reminding me to enjoy life about me a little. I have my wonderful wife and two adoring, happy-go-lucky dogs with me and everything feels good… balanced. I am a lucky guy and strive to never forget that.

First Day

First days. They have since grade school been a cause of blind anxiety and excitement all wrapped in one. Today was my first day at my new job and it went swimmingly well. There was the anticipated feelings of familiarity and much more unknown. I love my new job and especially who I am working for and am thrilled to pour my enemies into its success. I also could see where even as drastic a leap from jobs as I have just made (temp fix to ongoing home) does not exclude having a modicum of baggage from the previous employer. However, I am respected and trusted here and am very happy to be moving forward finally. It has been a while. I can't wait for day two!

The Streak is Over

Yesterday was my first day without running since December 30th. I was awfully proud of my streak, ending with 140 consecutive days. I appreciate and respect rest days, but just didn't feel like stopping. The marathon left me a little sore, but on the whole not too bad. One of the things about the streak that was getting tough was keeping it going. I am glad to take a few days off and rest up some. I am already feeling itchy to get back out, but I know my legs are reaping more benefit from not right now. It is wonderful to have found something like running that recharges, exhausts, and ultimately refocuses me. Yesterday I felt a bit fuzzy without that daily hit. Balance though is a beautiful thing.

Quiet

After all the hullaballoo this last weekend, I am greatly enjoying my cup of coffee, the soft rain outside and some good music. It feels good to have tis down time right now. Some exciting changes are coming in the next weeks and I am very much ready to take them on. But for now I am savoring the rest and recoup time after yesterday's run. Even the dogs are sleeping a little sounder this morning.

Simple Morning

There are just some simple pleasures that can certainly get a day off to a good start. Today I was awoke by one of our dogs just looking at me. At first a bit disorienting, I quickly saw my wife had figured this to be a funny way to get me up and she quickly burst out in a laugh. I adore that laugh. I walked our dogs and enjoyed a great cup of coffee. It changed into my running clothes and headed out for one of my easy taper runs through my neighborhood. The air was chilly but still ok for shorts and short sleeves. The houses in my neighborhood are old and beautiful and my legs already feel ready for the marathon a week from Sunday. It's just been one of those days to savor the moments.

Actual Spring

It's supposed to rain this evening and to me that feels like when Spring actually begins. I am feeling the bug to purge the closet, clean the corners, and open the windows. There is a great energy about this time of the year and personally I needed the rejuvenation. With a much more intense marathon training schedule, I have been feeling just worn out. I am glad for the rain and the fresh breath that just comes when Spring actually comes.

What I Should Have Said

I had an interaction yesterday that has just stuck with me. Right or wrong, I can not seem to let this discussion go. It's frustrating to me to keep replaying it over and over again, although I know it is very normal to do so. The whole fantasy of having a conversation where you said this or that seems fairly common. What irks me is when it was an unpleasant one and I continue to stay in the discomfort, reliving it. To paraphrase a friend, healthy is not having conversations with people that aren't there. While that seems a no brainer when considering going all Harvey, when I apply it to my mind I am challenged at times. Especially right now. Rarely can I just change for the sake of change without knowing why. This seems simple enough though. I need to stop replaying that conversation to feel better. Simple, not easy.

Workin' Through

I have yet to hold a job where there doesn't seem to be some adverse element to contend with. Whether that be slow business or just individuals that see things differently than I do. While there is always the temptation to say they are wrong or things would be better in another job, that seems a waste of time. They are always there. Without the option to just not work (which personally would drive me mad), I have come to the conclusion that no matter how ridiculous these folks seem to be, I can not avoid them. My happiness therefor can not be tied to there acting differently than I would wish. A wise man once asked me,"would you like to be happy or right?" As infuriating as that question can be, it more often than not seems accurate in the small things.

At Ease

It was one of those days where everything just feels easier to deal with. I am not entirely sure why. Sometimes even just keeping a good song in my head helps deal. Today, I was just at ease. I accredit some daily practices but for what it is worth I am grateful to have one of these. It made the ride at the end of the day that much sweeter.

Turning the Volume Down.

Today's 20 mile run went smooth in hind site. While I was on it, it was a struggle to be sure. Aches were intense and the drive was low. Being tired and hungry definitely comes out when running that long. What I was thrilled about was that I headed out with a heavy head, all sorts of bothers and troubles that had been weighing me down for the last couple days. As the miles piled up, the worries diminished, as if the volume was getting turned down. They were still there, but the tooth was gone. I appreciate that more than anything else about running. No matter how far I go, when I am done I have run. That fact alone makes most days better. It's worth lacing up.

Possibile

It's an nice snowy April morning. I made some pancakes and had a great walk with the dogs. It's been a wonderful way to start the day. Although it's technically my Friday as far as work goes, there is always a new start feeling to Mondays as well that personally I find a degree optimistic too. Perhaps it's that I am looking for something that I feel certain I will find. Not sure. To me Monday's are as much a fresh start as some see Spring itself. You put a Monday like this in Spring and well that's a double shot of possibility. All this might be the pancakes talking, but if that's what they are saying, I say let 'em talk.